Thoughts, Opinions, Gripes, and Grievances


Kian Pfannenstiel, Writer

The English Language, as we all know, is terrible. There is little consistency in most of what we use. There is too much wrong with the language for one person to fix in any amount of time that’s less than a great number of years. However, we can make it a little better by fixing the alphabet, which I intend to do in the near future. When it is finished, I’ll show you. But for now, let’s focus on one letter. ‘C’.

The letter ‘c’ is useless the way it is currently being used. Either it sounds like an ‘s’, which we already have a letter for (if you didn’t know, I was referring to ‘s’) or it sounds like a ‘k’, which we also have a letter for (in this case, the letter is ‘k’, and not ‘s’, if you hadn’t gathered). So why do we have the letter ‘c’? It stands in where other letters could do better, because we always know that ‘k’ sounds like a ‘k’, outside of certain known exceptions (see what I did there?) and that an ‘s’ should, in most scenarios, sound like an ‘s’ (I did it again!).

Well, I have an answer to my own question. We have the ‘ch’ sound, which requires the letter ‘c’. But, if that is the letter’s only use, why not just make that the only way the letter ‘c’ is used? Make the word ‘clever’ into ‘klever’ and the word ‘choose’ into ‘coose’. It’s pronounced the same way, just spelled differently. Now we’ve reduced the uses of ‘h’ by one and brought ‘c’ to a state where it is most useful, and impossible to use in the wrong manner.